Spiritual Orgasms?

Absolutely. There is orgasm in the spirit world. It lacks the sweaty muscularity, the grunting and groaning and grinding, the effort and expelling of force of physical sex. But there is definitely orgasm, the envelopment of being in ecstasy, the moment of blissful surrender. Think of the sex scene in the pool in the movie "Cocoon." The alien, who is a being of pure light, simply touches the human and he is overcome with bliss.

How the hell do I know that, you ask? Direct experience is and has always been, my primary teacher. The issue is whether you can tell the difference between a wet dream and spiritual sex with another being. If you've had both, you can tell the difference. There may or may not be a physical dimension to the spiritual encounter.

I remember my first "wet dream." I was about 20 years old and I was in a relationship. It wasn't a good relationship, as I was as yet incapable of that. The sex was one-sided, and afterwards I would unwind myself from whatever excitement had built up, and fall asleep listening to the guy snore blissfully at my side. It was a lonely affair, disappointing to say the least. Then one night, after I went to sleep still aroused and frustrated as hell, I woke up in the middle of an orgasm. It was a rousing orgasm and I awoke gasping for air. When I realized what was happening, I distinctly remember smiling. The dolt beside me woke up too and wanted to know what was going on. "Oh nothing. Just a dream," I told him. This was pure physical release.

Fifteen or so years ago, I was out of town doing training, and I had a student in the class with whom I had an immediate chemistry. A sudden flare of attraction, something that was going nowhere, but was undeniable nonetheless. I made it clear that I was unavailable. He made it clear that he was unavailable. That was that. Then that night, I awoke in the middle of an orgasm. But this time, it was not coming from my imagination. His presence in the room was palpable. His taking of me, while thrilling, was aggressive, invasive. Upon awakening, I was immediately aware of being violated. Mentally, I fought him off. In spite of the sexual pleasure I felt, it wasn't a pleasant experience. The next day in class, he tried to act like nothing had happened, but there was a touch of smugness and self-satisfaction in his demeanor, and he stayed far away from me after that. This was a spiritual assault.

My deceased ex-husband paid me a visit some years ago. Although the experience was thoroughly enjoyable, and I awoke immersed in total self-indulgence of how pleasurable it was, the fact remains that it was uninvited. Consequently, I sent him a mental message to that effect, as soon as I woke up enough to realize who it was I was making love to. It was a little irritating and I felt taken advantage of. The mental message I sent him was, essentially, "Knock it off!"

Most recently, an old friend showed up in a dream and made love to me. It certainly seems my guard is down when I am asleep. When I woke up, I was thoroughly enjoying the encounter, right up until I was awake enough to know what was going on, at which point I recoiled. No orgasm that time, only because I woke up too soon. It was definitely working out well up to that point. In this case, we were both alive and sleeping in our respective beds, with our respective spouses. A few days later, he was back, in another dream. But this time, it was not sex that he wanted. He wanted to connect with someone who loved him, and he wanted reassurance. He was worried. I distinctly remember holding my hand on his cheek and telling him everything was going to be okay. I remember the expression on his face as he looked at me, and especially his eyes. "Yes, it's going to be okay." Three days later, he died.

The rest of the time, if I do have a sexual dream it involves my husband. If I wake up during the dream, I generally wake him up too, so we can make love right away, which is always fun. Sometimes, I wake up horny in the morning or after a nap. It's a no-brainer. I tell him about it, and let things evolve naturally from there. Why waste perfectly good sexual energy?

I never feel guilty about a horny or "wet" dream. But when another man visits me in spirit and we make love, I always feel like I've cheated on my husband. The trouble is, in spirit there isn't the restraint there is in waking consciousness. By the time consciousness kicks in, it is too late.

Personally, I have only gone out spiritually to contact another person on one occasion. That time I was so angry, my intention was to hurt him. When I got there, I saw his bare chest rising and falling with his breath. I didn't see his face or any other part of him, just his chest. At the point of contact with him, I was overcome with love. Any thought of hurting him disappeared. Other than that one time, I've never attempted to travel in spirit to another person.

The exception to this, of course, is Reiki. When I do a distance healing or attunement, I bring the person's spirit into my space. Or, put another way, I create a space between my hands in which the other person's spirit occurs for a time. So, in essence, I am there and they are here. But back to spiritual orgasms. They are disembodied, which makes them no less real, just different than an orgasm "in the flesh."

If there is anything about this physical life that is worth missing, it is probably sex.